Monday, November 26, 2012

Rule 5

My friend and I sat down to watch People Like Us. Towards the end, they pulled out some great advice. A list of 6, but the fifth rule resonated with me.

"Lean into it. The outcome doesn't matter. What matters is that you were there for it, whatever it is - good or bad."
Some days I feel like I'm running - in the opposite direction, while others, I'm diving head first into things. I haven't found the balance between the two and just leaned. I'm either scared or blindly obsessed, which leads me to not be all there. No full connection between body, mind and soul.

I've been afraid of missing out on life for my entire life, which doesn't make any sense. But I think a lot of people go through that; get stuck in the routine of it all and worry and waste away all the time that could have been used to make something real.

To feel that connection. Whatever it may be. Whatever gives you that clarity in those moments in life. Lean into that. Tap into that source of power. Maybe it's in another person, within yourself or even outside the known and concrete. Just to find clarity in the bad moments, or in any moment and just be there. That is ....

I thought long and hard for a word that would describe that situation, but couldn't come up with any. That's the thing with life, not all things come and go with ease. Some things are good, and some things are bad. But they're all moments strung together that make up our story, so we might as well be there for it. Own it. Be there, in the good and the bad.

Learning how to block out all the expectations and desired outcomes of my decisions has been a challenge, but everyday I am learning. Life is full of learning opportunities. We just need to learn to grab them and grow from them and know that life is not seperate stepping stones, but rather a cummulative process. Everything you do has an effect on the next thing you think, feel and act out and knowing that allows you to be there, in that moment and understand and interpret everything the way it should be.

As for me, I think I have the best little teachers out there. They're always putting things into perspective for me; the little joys and the little moments of life. A constant reminder just to lean into it.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Live Free or Die

Wow. A lot time has flown by since my last post. Lots of new adventures, lots of studying, and lots of exam writing.

In a nutshell, school is going. It's hard, especially on the days where I just want to play with my dogs. It's getting more difficult as the days are getting shorter and Christmas approaches. But wow, I only have three weeks left until exams! If my entire three degrees go by this fast, I'm thinking it won't be so bad afterall. Three. I do throughly enjoy my sports and exercise psychology class, though. Especially since the content is relevant to agility. :) And the prof is Irish.

I can't tell you how many times I have seriously thought about just getting up one day, packing my bags, my dogs and head out west to live in the mountains. What a rad life that would be. pure freedom.

On the plus side, I've met some really cool people, and slowly but surely, I'm crawling out of my comfort zone. Some days I curl up in my safe cocoon and stay in the familiar and other days I dip my toes into the puddle. Soon I will dive right into the ocean, but for now, puddles are good. In other words, I like being alone sometimes and there isn't anything wrong with that. Introverts unite! Er, individually!

University is more or less what I thought it would be. Just more school. Nothing too special. I might have something entirely different to say if I was living on campus, though. I hear some pretty awesome stories from residence.

But I always have my best friends. :)

On the doggie adventure side of things, lots of stuff has happened as well. Toffee ended trialling early this year, but it was for the best. Her back didn't treat her so well this year, perhaps due to the lack of excellent quality massages by Elana. We miss her. Even though Q's aren't exactly what we're going for, Toffee did manage the most Q's in one season yet in her career! That was kind of cool. We are close-ish to getting our Versitility Lifetime Award. I know we will be able to gather the rest of our steeplechase Q's, but the remaining 36 team Q's will be next to impossible, considering no one offers it anymore. Oh well, Toffee has nothing left to prove anymore. I just love that girl.

Mach has been on a couple more adventures than Toffee this year. Mainly because he's the most well behaved boy ever. Minus counter surfing. That's another blog post altogether. Agility wise, he just keeps getting better and better. Looking back, there's no way I could have guessed that we would be where we are at this point in time, or ever really. We just keep flapping our wings and we keep soaring.

We did a Jess Martin Seminar, brought backs lots to work on. We went to a CAANS trial, knocked some bars, but also whipped out some amazing times. We did end up getting one Q that weekend, which was the Challenge course. We also just got back from a very big and exciting adventure from the states!

New Hampshire for a USDAA tournament! The further away you go, the bigger the event feels. We were slightly oblivious to the rules, or at least I was. Snooker. Damn snooker rules! Y U NO THE SAME?! Even with my confusion for most of the weekend, Mach came out with the fastest time or one of the fastest times in 7 of his runs! That is a big deal to me! I honestly didn't think Mach would ever be confident enough to let go while he ran on course. And he is! While keeping his turns. Gah. I'm just so proud of this dog. He was stress free all weekend. Even more hyped up than I have ever seen him, for all of his runs. Usually as the weekend goes on, he gets less excited to go out and run, but he successfully gave me 32 bruises on my legs. Pure excitement.

My favourite run of the weekend was definitely Team Jumpers. He came 2nd in the run, by 0.1 of a second. That course was a toughy. (I caused a spin before a backside of the jump. Trust him, Erin.)Lots of handling, but so exhilarating. If any of you wacthed the video I made of Mach's weekend, you will see just how excited I was. He was running at 22 for the first time in over a year, and I was loving how he was moving. NO BARS. Big deal.

My other favorite was the Team Relay. After thinking there was no way we were able to qualify due to our 2 E's and my 1pt Snooker run and then realizing that some points are multiplied by 1.5 (So, I actually got the team 1.5 points for snooker....jussayin') and that we could still qualify if we all went clean in the Team, we were pumped. It started a little shaky by me making us almost miss our run and then the lady not giving me the baton.
 "Excuse me, can I have the baton?! Hello? Can I have the baton? I NEED the baton!!" *as she walks away* "I NEED THE BATON!!!" "Wendy has the baton." "NO, I NEED THE BATON" They were waiting for me. I panicked. I'm sorry for yelling, kind lady.

We all ended up going clean, with only 5 faults. We had the fastest time by far, and just so you all know, team relay is worth 450 points, not 250, so when you think you'll only get the minimum points, you'll really get over 1000 points.

*Enter laugh attack on the floor here*

We qualified, placed 9th overall and while we had another laugh attack, we also had a dance party and strangers joined us and it was happy.

We had lots of laughs that weekend. Mostly about the most ridiculous state slogan. Life Free or Die.

We became really good at stuffing our face with frozen yogurt, too. Like it said, Life Free or Die. We weren't taking any chances. All or nothing.

Everyday I'm looking for more adventures, more places to explore, more freedom to be found, and every day, I find myself a little more.