Saturday, April 7, 2012


Sometimes I get into these bizare moods where I think about the depths of the universe. And all the people that live in it and all of their stories - their journies. Sometimes I freak myself out and get really overwhelmed by it all. My eyes get all shifty and foggy.

And parallel universes. Those are mind blowing.
The moon, the stars, the sun.

And then I think about moments in time and those who I shared them with. Those moments were so different for me than they were for them. Each person was going through something completely different than I was going through in that moment. We all see things differently, we all do things differently, we all smell things differently, we all hear things differently, yet we were all there, all sharing that one moment. I keep thinking to myself how insane it all is, all the dynamics and perspectives come together all in that one teensy tiny moment. Or maybe it's a big moment, and then it's even cooler.

I wonder how we all exist. The mere existance and function of humans, to me, is so far out that I will never be able to grasp any form of a concept in my mind.

Society, a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
Society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me
Society, have mercy on me
I hope you're not angry if I disagree
- Eddie Vedder

Then there's the corner of my mind that wonders about all the different perspectives of not only people, but of society and the views and beliefs it plants in peoples minds. How can people think someone or something is wrong or right? Maybe it's all morals. But it was all planted there. Nobody really thinks of anything on their own, do they? It all comes from somewhere. Where it originated, I can't say. But it's odd to think that there are so many fights and wars and arguments about a difference in perspective, when they probably don't even know where they gained the belief that they are fighting for.

Blah, blah, blah, I know, I know.

If there's something that I know for certain, for myself, I need to go on a trek. Through the wilderness. Somewhat of a pilgrimage, for the spiritual aspect, but not for religion. I need open space. I don't need things, I just need space and fresh air. I need adventure. It's something that has been scarce. I need to go Into the Wild.

"The freedom and simple beauty is too good to pass up."

 Okay, side note.
I've been obsessing lately over Into the Wild. I half watched it when it came out, with my brother (who reminds me so much of Chris McCandless) But there's been something inside me that felt like I needed to read the book and watch the movie again. I've been listening to the soundtrack all day, and I realized what song Hard Sun actually is. And that I LOVE Eddie Vedder. Like, love. Anyway, I saw on a video that quote above. I wanted to make sure that it was from the movie, and I came across this and this quote (after I wrote this entire post);

"Two years he walks the earth. No phone, no pool, no pets, no cigarettes. Ultimate freedom. An extremist. An aesthetic voyager whose home is the road. Escaped from Atlanta. Thou shalt not return, 'cause "the West is the best." [Editor's note: This is quoted from Jim Morrison and the Doors song "The End"] And now after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure. The climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage. Ten days and nights of freight trains and hitchhiking bring him to the Great White North. No longer to be poisoned by civilization he flees, and walks alone upon the land to become lost in the wild."
- Alexander Supertramp, May 1992

"The climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage"

I think it's a sign. I'm just gonna run on fate on this one.

Go find yourself.

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